Bullies @ Work
Monday blues are a common syndrome but if the thought of going to office starts a slideshow of all the bullies then it’s time to take some action.
Bullying is very common practice and it can be done by anyone; your boss, your co-worker or even your subordinate. Wikipedia defines workplace bullying as, ‘the tendency of individuals or groups to use persistent aggressive or unreasonable behavior against a co-worker’ The emphasis being on the word “persistent” since workplace bullying is a repetitive act and can affect a victim’s health and productivity.
Bullying has been proved to result in stress and consequent health problems like depression, panic attacks, insomnia and other personal issues such as loss of self esteem/ confidence and deteriorating relationships with family & friends. Such actions aren’t specific to the victims and witnesses of bullying but can also cause organizations to suffer. A stressed out victim who is concerned about the bully’s next move, fails to focus on work at hand and therefore, his/ her productivity and efficiency falls. Other costs to the organization include high levels of absenteeism, breakdown of teams/ work relationships and finally high staff turnover. In an age when most companies want to be the ‘employer of choice’, bullies make it difficult for people to work and put the reputation of the organization at stake.
One can form a non exhaustive list of actions that bullies do to harass and incase if you have been a victim or a witness I am sure you know what I am talking about. J So before we move on, allow me to share with you “what ISN’T bullying”:
- Performance feedback: People who work with us have a right to share their feedback with us regarding our job. Often those around us are our mirrors and we should look up to them to further improve and develop ourselves. Criticism and encouragement can both be used to give feedback, but ‘quick to criticize and slow to praise’ method is not ideally the best way of giving performance feedback. Be warned that performance problems should be identified and dealt in a constructive manner that is not humiliating or threatening. Incase if you are not the only one feeling the heat then it isn’t bullying!
- Ad hoc events: As mentioned earlier ‘one of’ incidents are suggestive of aggression or simply a ‘bad day’ but not bullying- bullying is a repetitive behavior. However, consider these incidents as warning signs to take timely preventive action.
Any other unreasonable behavior like mean verbal comments, social isolation at work, over burdening the victim with work to make sure it isn’t complete or setting unrealistic deadline, withholding vital information and constant criticism are a few of the more common forms of bullies.
Based on their bullying style, here is a list of the most notorious types of bullies:
Double-edged swords: They take the credit when things turn out well and point fingers at you when things go wrong. In either case your performance is at stake!
Big mouths: They are always ready to pass comments on one thing or another about you. Sometimes these remarks are demeaning and very obvious; at other times these are subtle comments made sarcastically! These bullies love to use labels like paranoid, lazy, unstable, complaining, and devious.
News channels: They fabricate stories based on partial facts to destroy reputation. Also known as the gossip mongers, they are people who others may not necessarily trust but then again they spice up your work environment with juicy news of the latest happenings and everyone is sure to listen to them. What they say spreads faster than forest fires so beware!
Doubtful Dummies: They undermine your smarts and pull you down. This could be for two reasons: Firstly, either they believe you are not capable and therefore never give you a chance to show your talent. Or secondly, they feel threatened because they think if given the opportunity you may actually out-smart them. More often than not a bully would directly attack by saying that your work is not up to the standard and denigrate your contributions. In extreme cases the bully might dismiss or misrepresent your work in meetings thus questioning your personality in front of others!
Response:
First look for patterns of repeated behavior and ensure that you are not misunderstanding. Be careful that your response doesn’t make you look like an “oversensitive child” or else you will be inviting more trouble your way. Therefore, it is critical that you don’t overreact, but behave objectively. Take your time to be sure that you are being targeted by your bullies and that they do not have a valid reason to do so!
Initially you may want to negate the cheeky remarks with a witty, funny but a daring statement as a “shut up call”. Be careful that these statements do not show aggression on your part but are suggestive of your stance on the problem at hand. The idea that needs to be communicated is that “this will not be tolerated”.
In case if you are being pulled down constantly and your subtle actions indicating your intolerance are not understood by the bully it is time to take this head on. Firstly, make sure you have friends at the top who are aware of your performance at work. These will help you form allies who can be sought for help, if needed. They come in handy when the doubtful dummies are undermining your performance and thus they are your support group you can tap into for assistance. Incase if you experience loss of confidence or need some advice this support group is always there for you. Interestingly, at times, if this support group is rather strong and powerful they may decide to speak for you and deal with the bully on your behalf. Such actions include informally discussing your situation with the tier above yours or even confronting the bully directly.
However, before the top tiers are involved an alternative option is the adult to adult talk to share concerns. An open dialogue with the bully is a better option than complaining like a kid to others in the organization. At times bully might not be aware of the impact s/ he has on you and your performance and thus by sharing your concerns clearly you have in fact opened doors to proper communication whereby the bully may decide to actually share his reasons for being so mean to you.
Lastly, if you decide to formally report a negative behavior, make sure that you discuss how this is affecting the business and your performance instead of cribbing about the personal stress it is causing you. To effectively do this keep in mind these two critical pointers:
- Emphasize your own competence: Highlight your professional credibility and history of career success to convey how this abusive behavior is hindering your ability to work at your potential.
- Be specific: Use clear language, provides concrete details (dates, times, behaviors, etc) and avoid vague descriptions
Finally, if things get worse, start looking for career options elsewhere!
Lastly let us discuss how bullying affects the overall organization and hence the steps that an organization needs to take to prevent it.
Stance that the organization needs to take to prevent bullying:
Time spent in an organization is highly valuable both for the employee and the employer. Performance of an organization is influenced by the productivity of its employees. However, with increased bullying activity within an organization, productivity goes down and hence the overall growth of the organization suffers. The great deal of time that a victim spends defending himself/ herself and networking for support and thinking about the problem could otherwise be spent on doing other work tasks.
So what can organizations do? Quite a few companies identify bullying as an unacceptable behavior in their staff handbook and have established proper systems for investigating, recording and dealing with conflicts. Organizations must bear in mind that complaints need to be investigated quickly while maintaining discretion and confidentiality and protecting the rights of all individuals involved.
Bullying- a common practice:
Bullying is a common activity around the world and although some countries like Australia and Ireland have legislations [e.g. in Victoria (Australia), legislation comes from Worksafe Victoria: if bullying endangers a worker's health causing stress or any other physical harm, a corporation can be found liable for not providing a safe place for their employees to work; similarly in Ireland, there is a Code of Practice for employers and employees on the prevention and resolution of bullying at work] others do not have a specific clause in their legislation but actions are taken against bullies if s/he affects the health of the victim. Essentially bullying is a personal attack and can take place to anyone at any level of the organization. Our response to these actions would truly determine the impact bullies can have on us both professionally and personally! If you have been a victim or a witness, the right question to ask yourself would be ‘what has this taught me?’ as opposed to “why me?”
About the Author
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